Hi Teubenragee,
I had some of the same problems that you mentioned.
I was able to learn how to do just about anything with Excel by reading chapter 15 "Using C++ Builder to Automate Word and Excel", of the book, "C++ Builder 4 Unleashed by Kent Reisdorph, et. al.". I believe Kent used to be the publisher of C++ Builders Developers Journal and is a very good writer and, in my opinion, knows C++ Builder better than even Charlie Calvert.
This may sound hard to believe but once you spend a couple of hours with chapter 15 you will be doing anything with Excel 4 through Excel 2000. I have recently automated exporting a SQL Server 7.0 query to an Excel 2000 file and C++ Builder 4 does it extremely fast.
The book is available on Amazon.com with ISBN 0-672-31510-6.
Good luck and email me at hhamner@onramp.net if you run into any stumbling blocks on using Excel automation.
Hank