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Geek humor 4

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johnherman

johnherman

MIS
Oct 10, 2003
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Math:
Q: What's the square root of 69?
A: 8 something.
Q: Why do you like 77 more than 69?
A: 69 and then 8 more.

Engineer:
The optimist says the glass is half full. The pessimist says the glass is half empty. The engineer says you used the wrong size glass.

====================================
Sometimes the grass is greener on the other side because there is more manure there - original.

 
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If Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% Perspiration is that why really bright people smell so bad?

Aspiring to mediocrity since 1957
 
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I'd call it tasteless, crude, inappropriate humor; especailly inappropriate for Tek-Tips.

Skip,
[sub]
[glasses]Just traded in my old subtlety...
for a NUANCE![tongue][/sub]
 
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Surely if it's that bad you'd Red Flag it. Tasteless, yes, but we are all adults here aren't we?

Aspiring to mediocrity since 1957
 
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Its like the celebrity sandwich shop that tried offering the John and Bo Derek sub, nobody liked it because it was tasteless.
 
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When the first Trojan Horse virus came out, it was in the form of an e-mail offering a free prize. The CBS anchor Charles Osgood commented:

The moral of the story is: Beware of Geeks bearing gifts.

-- Francis
Francisus ego, sed non sum papa.
 
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The door mat I always wanted to get..."There's no place like 127.0.0.1
 
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I actually made this joke up - not a Geek joke, but a Geek's joke.

Q: What does a mortician magician say when performing his magic trick?
A: Abracadaver!

ACSS - SME
General Geek

 
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Code: 
[tt]
+---------+
|         |
|127.0.0.1|
 \       /
   \   /
     V
[/tt]

Skip,
[sub]
[glasses]Just traded in my old subtlety...
for a NUANCE![tongue][/sub]
 
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Skip,

Very clever, but our non-American friends have no clue what your diagram means.

[santa]Mufasa
(aka Dave of Sandy, Utah, USA)
“People may forget what you say, but they will never forget how you made them feel.
 
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It certainly is not cricket!

In the game of baseball, there are 4 bases. Three are square bags and the 4[sup]th[/sup] is a 5 sided shape, the placement of each has a side on a baseline and resides completely within the in-bound area of play.


Skip,
[sub]
[glasses]Just traded in my old subtlety...
for a NUANCE![tongue][/sub]
 
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...this 5-sided base is called "home" or "home plate."

Skip,
[sub]
[glasses]Just traded in my old subtlety...
for a NUANCE![tongue][/sub]
 
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Baseball, That's rounders isn't it?

A Maintenance contract is essential, not a Luxury.
Do things on the cheap & it will cost you dear
 
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Lastest take on 2 kinds of people in this world:

1) those that can extrapolate from incomplete data


**********************************************
What's most important is that you realise ... There is no spoon.
 
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There are 10 types of people in the world.
Those who understand binary, and those who don't.


There are 3 types of people in the world
Those who can count, and those who can't.

84% of all statistics are made up.



Just my 2¢

"What the captain doesn't realize is that we've secretly replaced his Dilithium Crystals with new Folger's Crystals."

--Greg
 
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|There are 10 types of people in the world.
|Those who understand binary, and those who don't.
(and those that didn't expect this to be in base 3)

**********************************************
What's most important is that you realise ... There is no spoon.
 
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(this is true). 70% of Americans think that they are Above Average drivers. Of course, this means that at least 20% are wrong.

====================================
Sometimes the grass is greener on the other side because there is more manure there - original.

 
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johnherman said:
(this is true). 70% of Americans think that they are Above Average drivers. Of course, this means that at least 20% are wrong.
Click to expand...
Not necessarily. Let's assign ratings between 1 and 10 for driving skill. If 80% of American drivers score an 8, and 20% score a 3, the average score would be 7. This would mean that 10% of American drivers actually underestimate their driving ability.
 
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Wow, that's pretty optimistic. From my experience, most drivers are equally bad. Say 95% rating around a 3. Since only 5% or less of us good drivers are rated higher than that, at least 95% of drivers are below average. Every one of those 3's that think they're a better driver are wrong! Maybe that's just Southern California though. [bigsmile]

KornGeek, your point is well taken. The actual "average" can be skewed higher or lower than someone may be assuming. I think when most people say they are better than average, they are using the term "average" to mean the middle of that 1 to 10 scale (5.5).


 
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